Posted by alesta on May 4, 2005, at 15:22:53
In reply to it never ends..i'm in trouble here.., posted by alesta on May 3, 2005, at 14:08:01
hi, i'm just posting this to update on my situation and help me deal/vent. one minute i think things are going to be okay, and then the next my mom's attacking me again. she just finished one of her tirades seconds ago..i'm so flustered, my ears are burning, i feel so emotionally violated. i'm shaking and feel overwhelmed. she keeps coming after me when i try to walk away from her..she doesn't stop. she's got that glare in the eye and invades my being/identity. i hate it. it's so much worse than just straight being yelled at.
she is going to help me get on my feet, possibly buy me another car (which i do appreciate so much and is so nice), but it comes at a great price..i feel like if i just go to a shelter i'll just be stuck there..i won't get a car and therefore won't be able to work.
oh my god, my mom hasn't changed. i am so scared she's going to affect my being. they say that if you're around a narcissist long enough, you tend to become like them. this didn't happen to me in childhood, but i'm still scared. just being here a few weeks isn't going to do that, is it?
oh man i am out of practice dealing with her..i thought i had found a way to 'adapt and overcome' by tiptoeing around her, and acting in doting manner..it helps things..but she still is going off on me..it's gonna be a long few weeks..but somehow i don't feel as panicked as yesterday, but still not good.
thanks to anyone for listening..i just needed to get that out.:)
amy
poster:alesta
thread:493159
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050503/msgs/493711.html