Posted by Phil on April 4, 2005, at 11:16:51
Depression and all it's wonder is hammering me again. Sleep all day and night on weekends, getting up occasionally for short periods.
Every day, I have to make a decision(force myself) to go to work. I'm stressed and bored at work at the same time. But, I can't stand the thought of going back to my apartment because I know I'll just sleep and worry about work. I feel like I'm going nuts and going nuts isn't convenient for me right now.
Money is a big issue as usual so I can't jump on a plane and fly away. If I could take off I have no idea where I could hide. I really am tired of this disease. I'm tired of having to try so hard for so little. Life should include long timeouts for mental illness. Not looking for answers here-just needed to get this out of my system.I've always loved this poem by Emily Dickinson:
______________I FELT a cleavage in my mind
As if my brain had split;
I tried to match it, seam by seam,
But could not make them fit.
The thought behind I strove to join
Unto the thought before,
But sequence ravelled out of reach
Like balls upon a floor.Phil
poster:Phil
thread:479637
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050330/msgs/479637.html