Posted by PhoenixGirl on February 18, 2005, at 23:16:08
Gosh guys, I'm going through a hard time. I haven't written in a while. At the beginning of the year, I quit my miserable job and went back to school to get a degree in journalism. Still not 100% sure if I made the right decision, but I tried.
In the past week, I've been going through PMS hell. I have PMS almost every month, but for some reason this month it's worse. I'm so sad and irritable. Maybe it's because I have zero social support, I'm in the middle of a big change in lifestyle, I haven't been taking my Wellbutrin as regularly as usual, who knows.
Today I got banned from another message board for cussing out other members who made me mad. Sometimes other members will say stupid or insensitive stuff, but I don't unleash a firestorm on them. Someone in my class accidentally touched my hand, and I wanted to choke them. I knew it was because of PMS, but I still felt the feeling.
God, I am just so frustrated. The suffering is overwhelming and I've had recurring fantasies of suicide. I have almost no friends, I'm estranged from my family, I've endured deep depression for most of my 27 years on earth. It's ridiculous, nobody should have to suffer like this. I just want to have a few close friends and a boyfriend, but I'm afraid I'm too crazy.
poster:PhoenixGirl
thread:460212
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050215/msgs/460212.html