Posted by AuntieMel on June 18, 2004, at 12:58:26
In reply to Re: why people ignore me » AuntieMel, posted by ramsea on June 18, 2004, at 3:16:01
Keep having fun? Not handcuffed to misery? Statements like that are just proof that my system is working.
I'm neither of things. And have had depression as long as I can remember, though I just went to a doc about it a couple of years ago when this really, really bad low hit that I'm just now starting to come out of a bit. It's unlikely that I'll ever be truly happy.
BUT - my defense mechanism, my desparate desire to feel approved of by somebody, let to some of these behaviors.
eccentricity - my dad wouldn't spend more than the minumum on the kids (though he had boats, fancy stereo, an airplane, we had 5 cars, a television in every room - in the 60's-70's) so I learned to make my own clothes rather than buy cheap.
having fun - ha! I was good at *looking* like I was having fun. When at my most miserable I laughed the most and cracked the most jokes.
And forget social competence. I was nearly 30 before I could make a phone call to a stranger. My mother had to make my doctor's appointments. I did find that when thrust into a social situation I could get through it asking the other person questions and get them talking about themselves and then listen intently. It's amazing, but they think you are a brilliant conversationalist when you do that.
poster:AuntieMel
thread:357478
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040611/msgs/357838.html