Posted by PhoenixGirl on May 21, 2004, at 22:40:18
You guys, I am feeling guilty about not helping sar before she killed herself. We emailed a lot before she died, and she was very supportive when I was going through ECT. But then we just sort of stopped writing, and I didn't reach out to her...Even though she said in one of her emails that when she works at Home Depot, she looks at the ropes they sell and thinks about hanging herself. In fact, when I read here that she died, I thought she must have hung herself.
I wonder if things would have been different if I had given her the same support she gave me. Maybe I am selfish...I feel horrible. She was so kind to me, and hadn't even met me.
This issue has been eating at me. Why didn't I help sar? I know that I was depressed enough to be getting ECT, so it may be unreasonable to think I could help someone who was suicidal. But around the same time, I did donate my efforts to a charity. So if I could do that, I should have been able to help sar. But no, I was absorbed in my damned self.
poster:PhoenixGirl
thread:349445
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040517/msgs/349445.html