Posted by LynneDa on April 13, 2004, at 15:06:54
In reply to Re: married » LynneDa, posted by Magdalena on April 13, 2004, at 14:50:30
> Thank you Mag, you're so sweet! You'll find your way. You're very insightful, introspective and kind. Heck, I'm 40 & just figured out what I was doing wrong a few years ago!
For so many years I focused on my ex-husband's issues, mine conveniently got pushed aside! Having a child really made me realize how important my stability is & I really started working. I'm not where I want to be yet, but I'm getting closer.
I totally understand your comments about when you are yourself you're at your happiest - that's a good thing to remember & work to incorporate into your personality. The over-dependence thing is something to keep watch over and even discuss with your boyfriend so he understands your reticence in certain areas. My husband was very understanding and went carefully & slowly in helping to dismantle my walls.
You sound like you are doing so well and have come a long way in a short time. You should be very proud of yourself!!
~ Lynne
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>hey Lynne,
> thanks for the post, that was some great advice about trying to better myself and not to try to be what someone else wants. You are right because i think that If i am myself at all times then i could only be Loved for being myself and not some reformed synthetic version...does that make sense? I love my boyfriend but i am guilty of being very objective in relationships and its when i let go of that and just let my feelings take over is when i am happiest, its just my fear of getting hurt that keeps me behind a wall..the wall is getting smaller and i think i am taking the right steps towards recovery.
>
> I think my biigest fear about relationships is losing my identity and becoming overly dependant on someone...man i think i need more therapy! LOL..thats ok i only started therapy a week ago, im sure eventually all this will come up.
>
> here i go again...blah blah blah..ignore me i am on a sugar high...;)
>
> Lynne you are truly wonderful.
>
> Mag
poster:LynneDa
thread:323847
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040406/msgs/336029.html