Posted by zeugma on March 27, 2004, at 17:41:42
In reply to Asperger's-like feelings, is this DP or meds, posted by Saltmarsh Rose on March 27, 2004, at 11:32:43
I feel very isolated because of my psychiatric conditions. At the same time I don't feel like I can 'get over them' because I have had them all my life and can't imagine a life spent feeling normal. I keep people at a distance, and this makes weekends very hard for me, because even though I might want to socialize sometimes my anxiety and lack of energy interfere with anything I plan.
And I don't feel like I have anything inside me. I feel completely empty inside. When I mentioned Asperger's to my therapist, she laughed and told me I didn't have that. But the emptiness, yes. The meds allow me to function, but they drain me of everything in the process.
I get very depressed on vacations and on weekends. I feel depersonalized, in that I feel like I don't matter at all, even to myself. I am doing everything I can this weekend to avoid becoming depressed. Listening to music, reading, organizing my kitchen table. A friend called me up and said he wanted to hang out but I didn't want to because it exhausts me to be around people and I have to make sure I am asleep early so I don't get depressed by missing any sleep (I am very sensitive to any lack of sleep, and it throws my mood off terribly). I feel like a worthless human being.
poster:zeugma
thread:329062
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040324/msgs/329195.html