Posted by Dr. Bob on September 16, 2003, at 19:46:09
In reply to Arvo Part and story 4 Katy, Katia « BarbaraCat, posted by Dr. Bob on September 15, 2003, at 19:15:31
Out of town » fluffy
Posted by BarbaraCat on September 15, 2003, at 20:50:25
In reply to Re: serotonergic?, posted by fluffy on September 14, 2003, at 14:45:36
Hi Katy and Katia,
I wanted to let you know, so you don't worry about me, that I'm going to be out of town visiting relatives for about 10 days. You might get this message twice cause I had a problem with my email. Take care of yo'selves, buddies. - Barbara----
Re: Out of town » BarbaraCat
Posted by katia on September 16, 2003, at 2:11:33
In reply to Out of town » fluffy, posted by BarbaraCat on September 15, 2003, at 20:50:25
Hi Barb,
if you get this, have a good time.
I'll be here when you get back!
Katia----
Arvo P. recommendation: Tabula Rasa is gorgeous (nm) » BarbaraCat
Posted by loolot on September 16, 2003, at 9:33:54
In reply to http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030912/msgs/260044.html
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Re: Thanks, friend » BarbaraCat
Posted by KimberlyDi on September 16, 2003, at 11:02:50
In reply to Thanks, friend » katia, posted by BarbaraCat on September 12, 2003, at 13:39:39
Barbara,
Sorry for butting in on a painfully personal post to katia. Your post "hit home" with me. Your fall from sobriety scares me. I've had so many "slips" and "slides" during my recovery that I feel like the old "wet N wild" water park that used to be across the highway from 6-flags in TX.Don't do this alone. AA, therapy, or better yet, a friend holding your hand through this. A warm hand, not your hand holding and right-clicking a cold mouse.
I'm praying for you.
KDi in Texas----
Re: Thanks, friend » KimberlyDi
Posted by BarbaraCat on September 16, 2003, at 13:05:19
In reply to Re: Thanks, friend » BarbaraCat, posted by KimberlyDi on September 16, 2003, at 11:02:50
Kimberly,
Not to worry about 'butting in'. There's no such thing on this board. Thanks so much for your support! I've been doing well since then. Many things surfaced just recently and I've been looking at them and while not easy, I'm understanding alot more about myself. The 'need' to go numb and run from looking was taking the form of alcohol. My Mom's recent death has me going through alot of things, both emotional and sorting through boxes of things that would of course bring up memories of a very painful childhood. Even though it was clear what I was doing, the need for relief was overwhelming and I made the choice to get that relief. But letting it get out of control, and doing it with white wine, which I have a confirmed allergy to, was self-destructive and making my life miserable. So, I had to find a way to work with a challenging situation.My life is somewhat split. My husband and I both follow a dedicated spiritual life, meditate, and such and most of our circle of friends do the same. But he's also a musician and plays in clubs and there I am out in the crowd supporting him, which is important for both of us. I'd prefer the clubs were more wholesome places, but at this point he has to take what he can get or else be a starving musician. There's no getting away from the pervasiveness of alcohol - it's everywhere and I think that staying away from it all together is unrealistic for me. So I recently had to come up with a compromise that I could live with that would not impede staying true to my spiritual convictions. That commitment is to drink one drink weekend nights and abstain the rest. And no white wine which has been the only liquor all my life that I've ever had a craving for. One Margarita or microbrew sits on my table all night long, provides somewhat of a human connection with the other patrons in places I'd otherwise have no interest in were it not for my husband's passion for playing music.
So far the plan seems to be working. I'm also working through alot of old stuff and and I've got to have a clear head to not get submerged in that stuff. In the process, I'm not feeling deprived, as I was in sitting in the clubs with a glass of club soda. That ruse doesn't fool anyone, especially my tastebuds. As far as therapy, I've had so many, many years of it and I'm very disillusioned with the managed care travesty, and insurance is the only way I could afford a therapist right now. My journal has truly been my most powerful therapist. Oh, and praying and listening to the answers.
Thanks for your concern and be assured that my self, my dharma path, and my husband won't let me get away with any sh*t for very long. Also, thanks for your prayers, I really mean that, I believe in them greatly, and know that the favor is returned to you.
> Barbara,----
Thanks, friend » BarbaraCat
Posted by KimberlyDi on September 16, 2003, at 15:24:30
In reply to Re: Thanks, friend » KimberlyDi, posted by BarbaraCat on September 16, 2003, at 13:05:19
Glad you understand that everything is not black and white in recovery. You know what works for you. I do something similar.
God Bless,
Kim :)
poster:Dr. Bob
thread:260402
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030913/msgs/260792.html