Posted by PollyF on July 12, 2003, at 22:38:34
In reply to Today seems decent, posted by yesac on July 12, 2003, at 14:58:32
I am so glad to hear all that, you sound like you are putting that first step forward, remember though, we take two steps forward and maybe one step back, along the way. Enjoy, what you are trying to do.
Talk to you soon.
> Thanks for all the words of support.
>
> Today seems to be going okay so far. Not sure why or what's different than the past few days, but I feel okay. I'm sort of excited about these goals that I've come up with for myself. Most of them really aren't anything that big, just smallish things to hopefully help me get a little more out of my life right now - like really trying to read more, even if it's really easy books, watching tv and crocheting, trying to eat more healthfully and do some kind of exercise. I used to be in good shape but it's really fallen off over the past months due to stress and depression, etc. But I realized that I am practically inactive except walking around from my car to the store and stuff like that. I have some bigger goals like planning some day/weekend trips to explore the state more and just try to get out into the sun to enjoy the summer.
>
> I don't know. Now my life is so dull and horrid it just seems like I need to do something to get more involved in life and try to enjoy it a bit more.
>
> Also... about talking to my doc about suicidal thoughts. I definitely have in the past, and with therapists sometimes talked a blue streak about suicide. But for some reason yesterday I couldn't bring it up. And I felt bad about that since the thoughts have really come back full force lately. I don't have any plans to act on them for now (ie today or tomorrow or anytime really) but of course we all know that can easily change. But, one thing is that I never actually have acted on any of these thoughts, though they certainly have been very serious at times, and I've been quite close.
>
> Well, I think that I will go home and sit on the porch and call my sister. And try to appreciate feeling okay while it lasts.
poster:PollyF
thread:240420
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030704/msgs/241343.html