Posted by leeran on April 18, 2003, at 11:40:20
In reply to Re: Dinah, you had me at hello. » leeran, posted by Dinah on April 18, 2003, at 10:00:45
"But what if you hadn't already gotten to know me from my posts?"
I don't think political views "make" the person, so I don't think I could mentally shut out someone just because of their politics (or for their religious views). That said, it wouldn't matter if it was post #1, or post #1001.
I like these types of questions because they offer an opportunity to really think about what does (and doesn't) push my buttons.
As I sit here scratching my head on this I think some of the behaviors that raise the figurative fur on my back are as follows:
1) Agendas, hidden or loosely veiled, that are designed to manipulate others into some type of behavior ("innocent" agendas are fine, i.e. for meetings, etc.)
2) Actions that endanger the lives of others.
3) Bullying. (BUT, as an adult I can better understand that bullying is often rooted in poor self-esteem).
4) Phoniness (unless my b.s. meter is all out of whack of whack hormonally, I haven't seen any of that here on these boards).
I went through two unpleasant divorces (what divorce IS pleasant?) and those two experiences used up a couple of lifetimes worth of ire. It's so much easier to try to get along than to prove myself right or “win.”
(Note, to anyone going through a divorce or about to go through a divorce I, unfortunately, recommend keeping at least some of your anger intact so that you won't ever feel like kicking your butt later for giving in because you were too weary to fight anymore)
In the years since the divorces (and leaving my seventeen year job with the same entity, which was almost like another divorce) I've let go of a lot of my anger toward other people. It’s the anger toward myself that eats at my insides. LOL, I just realized, I’m too damned selfish to judge anyone else, it might take away precious time from judging myself! Proving once again that some of the greatest love affairs only involve one person.
poster:leeran
thread:220134
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030414/msgs/220373.html