Posted by bozeman on February 18, 2003, at 21:59:50
In reply to Re: Interview Hell » Peter S., posted by JohnV on February 18, 2003, at 21:14:27
John -- good suggestions and well thought out.
Some small tricks I used coming out of grad school (interview hell to be sure -- lots of interviews but no jobs to be had for most of my classmates.) These are certainly no guarantees, but they made me *look* more comfortable to interviewers, so people responded to me better, and the situation didn't become awkward so I didn't flip out and start babbling gibberish (you know what I mean.)
First and most important -- Practice smiling in front of a mirror until you can do it without looking forced. Practice several different smiles to see what's the best for you. The most effective one I found is the "eyes-only" smile, where you tighten the muscles on your temples (kind of the same muscles you would tighten to wiggle your ears - but don't wiggle, just tighten and hold.) This very subtly lifts your cheeks and eyebrows, people won't know you're doing it, but they will like you without knowing why. It's only an "edge" but sometimes every little bit helps. The whole time the interviewer is talking, I lock eyes with them and use this smile. It gives the appearance that you are hanging on their every word, and most people love that. It also makes you look open and approachable, and most employers feel safer with that.
This one may sound crazy, and not everyone can do this for *many* reasons, but a non-credit drama class at a community college helped me tremendously. I was depressed at the time, but not anxious, so strangers didn't bother me (I really didn't care one way or the other, ha ha) and it was non credit so there was nothing to lose. Very low pressure and would have been fun if I hadn't been so depressed. What I was looking for was help in figuring out how to not *look* depressed (body language, etc.) and it must have worked, as I have been able to successfully hide depression from current employer of over 5 years.
Neither of these things will directly make you *feel* any less anxious, but they can keep you from *looking* anxious, so the situation stays calmer and you can retain the control you do have.
Hope this helps. Best of luck to you both.
bozeman
poster:bozeman
thread:201539
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030215/msgs/201711.html