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this is what happens when....

Posted by Alii on June 30, 2002, at 9:08:59

In reply to Beardy! , posted by Alii on June 30, 2002, at 8:53:54

...the innercritic has been hushed by lack of sleep and morning panic.

I let down mask of doing well and holding it together somewhat and let some real me hang out......clumsy and oafishly I do this as I lack some social graces.

I hurt inside so much of the time....how much is from traumas I have survived? how much is from the depression hell I live? does it matter?

I am not giving in to these dark thoughts I have nor am I willing to throw in the towel yet anyway. I claw and fight and struggle against depression every day and each moment in my life.

Without a therapist I'm sorely lacking 'more appropriate' venues to air my dirty laundry.....my pain......my truth.......my hellish life that pains me because I know that more than half the thoughts in my head on any given day are depressive rubbish

Panic does not become me.

Apologies to any who find my reality ugly.

--a.


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poster:Alii thread:25900
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020629/msgs/25910.html