Posted by wendy b. on June 24, 2002, at 9:59:16
In reply to I think you're right, KK. » krazy kat , posted by Phil on June 22, 2002, at 18:46:51
> "It doesn't sound to me like the marriage is what is causing the suicidal tendencies. The move was a trigger for your depression, imho, and not letting out your anger is compounding it"
>
> By Jove you're onto something there, KK, looks like a bullseye.
KK, Phil and Mandy,Yes, I think it's true, the depression is talking. And moving Mandy to suicide, etc.
I think the husband's lack of "affect," is difficult, too. I see this in couples a lot (student of human nature, moi!) If one partner is not doing so well, or is in a crisis (Mandy being in the hospital), the other pulls back and becomes "stoic," probably from some unconscious fear that if they both fell apart, there would be nothing left of either of them, that everything would come crumbling down. But in fact, if he could have expressed some tiny emotion, like fear, or sadness (such as telling Mandy he was scared of losing her), it would have meant a lot to her, I'm sure.
I know couples counselors deal with this a lot. It might be helpful to them... Mandy, what do you think?
Wendy
poster:wendy b.
thread:25577
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020616/msgs/25638.html