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Re: Why do I dislike my husband after 34 years? » Mandy

Posted by Phil on June 22, 2002, at 11:49:24

In reply to Why do I dislike my husband after 34 years?, posted by Mandy on June 22, 2002, at 8:34:27

Sorry you are going through so much, Mandy. I wish I could make a relationship last 34 minutes.

Just because he's a nice guy doesn't mean you should feel guilt for having the feelings you have. As a christian church counselor told me once, guilt is a wasted emotion and I agree 100%.

Did y'all agree to move for his job or did you maybe not want to? I'm sure you had second thoughts. Do you ever get in his face, so to speak or at least tell him that you're angry.

Have you seen a marriage counselor? Together?

I've always seen situations in my life as black or white or black and blacker as one therapist said. It's a stifling way to live, I never see the ,"Well, why not just take baby steps?"

I have no experience to work from but I would certainly get a divorce if I was unhappy to the point of suicide. If you and he can't work things out then maybe separate for a few months.

I'm sure you've thought of all of this before but the central question to ask yourself is,"What do I need to make me happy or to give me some serenity?" BIG emphasis on 'I'.

Wishing you the best,

Phil


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poster:Phil thread:25577
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