Posted by terra miller on May 13, 2002, at 18:20:54
In reply to Re: Part Two, posted by paxvox on May 13, 2002, at 18:11:38
this may sound depressing, but... you may not be the one that your wife chooses to talk to. she may never talk to you. that's one of the things that drove my spouse crazy is that i never told him anything and only told my therapist; he wanted to be in on things to help me, but i was too scared of everybody. he meant well, but i've never told him about the stuff i talk about in therapy. and i am doing well because it's something that i choose to do and ultimately your wife has to choose it, too which i'm sure feels frustratingly out of your control.
if she is acting unsafe, it would be good for you to know what your options are and what you will do if she needs you to keep her safe.... that is, if she's really depressed and suicidal you should have a plan. eventually she'll have her own plan on how to stay safe if she has a tendency to harm. (she has to make her own decisions otherwise she will keep feeling controlled and it will feel like reabusive behavior to her.) a good therapist will help to equip her with these skills.
terra
poster:terra miller
thread:23499
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020509/msgs/23684.html