Posted by Shar on March 10, 2002, at 13:42:12
In reply to Like more input on original post, if any (nm), posted by Phil on March 5, 2002, at 20:37:29
You know, I had a therapy session last week in which we were talking about personal drama. And, Wendy's post reminded me of it when she mentioned fireworks.
It is very, very common IMO for addicts to love drama, and, in fact, act it out frequently in their own lives. I certainly did. Often it was drama that made me feel anything at all. I was so shut down in other ways, it took something pretty extreme to get my attention. Sort of like high-risk behavior in a personal way.
Drama...we all have our own personal dramas that we act out over and over (IMO), and in my case it is with intimate relationships with men. It is almost like the drama was the focus--because I did not know how to get to the intimacy (especially not in a healthy way) and I defined intimacy as the drama. Of course, I'm much better now.....
I was told once that by using my creative side, in whatever way I could, that was a way to release the energy of the drama, so I didn't have to act it out so much in my own life. I discovered (contrary to my beliefs) that real relationships don't have a blueprint that is followed until the expected outcome is achieved (oooh, high drama there!).
I also found out that I could learn to look at others and their dramas with a little detachment and not get pulled in. There is a guy where I work, and this guy just can't stand me. If I call him for help (he is a helper person on some of my shifts) he does this BIG sigh, and I can see him roll his eyes, and he hates to talk to me. At one time I could have gotten into that pretty well, reacted a whole bunch; now, it seems like that is his drama, and he is welcome to it, and I know I serve a purpose as a thorn in his side 8-).
Hope this made some sense. I guess my point was about drama in relationships, that it serves a purpose, being able to see it, and how some relationships are all about drama more than intimacy, in my own experience.
I just reread this. Oh, yeah...this made a LOT of sense...well, at least I tried. 8-)
Take care.
xoxo
Shar
poster:Shar
thread:19169
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020305/msgs/19560.html