Posted by akc on December 4, 2001, at 8:30:49
In reply to Re: AA « Noa, posted by Gracie2 on December 3, 2001, at 22:36:49
Gracie,
What happened to you was shameful. I have never experienced an AA meeting as you described. In the meetings I have attened, if a person's drinking comes up at all, it is an opportunity for a person to come forward at the beginning of the meeting that they have drank -- and it is not about being berated, but about beginning a new way of life. And it is so voluntary. I drank this past Saturday. I have been to two meetings. Neither of those meetings have even brought up this standard "opening" question -- so I haven't even felt that pressure there that I might feel of a long time member of AA.
When I first came to AA and after my first relapse, when I did reach out, there was no berating -- instead, as the big book describes, a lot of people shared their story of coming to the program and what the program has done for them. AA should never be a person telling another what to do -- it should always be about sharing my own experience, strength and hope -- the idea then is that the person listening will hear something in the story that he or she will want and will do what I did -- work the steps, come to meetings, call people when the urge to drink is there, etc.
I hate when I hear that such stuff goes on as you experienced, because I know from experience that meetings as you described are the exception, not the rule. To be wounded by AA -- it just makes me stomping mad. (Though, I will say, rumors have it that some NA may be as you doctor describes it -- and if the risk is there, he may not have wanted to chance it.)
This may be to much to ask, but if you ever are fighting your drinking/drugging, I would urge you to try a different AA meeting. They can vary a lot.
I'm sorry this happened to you.
akc
poster:akc
thread:14546
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011130/msgs/14865.html