Posted by galtin on October 13, 2001, at 7:25:48
In reply to mixed state or lack of discipline?, posted by sar on October 11, 2001, at 17:59:03
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> My supervisor told me that if i left, i'd get an "occurence" which would be the last straw for me 'cos i was already on Final Written Warning for tardiness/absences. so i could stay, leave and get fired, or just straight-up quit. i chose the latter.
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> i walked home 4 miles, bar-hopping the whole way, and i cried really hard. they were nice when i signed all the forms to quit, cool people, but then a dam in my throat broke and i sobbed hard as i walked down the highway, i don't know why, i cried cried cried like i haven't in awhile.
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> i've spent today wondering if i should have just sat it through at work. is this just lack of discipline, willpower? i know i wouldn't have *really* pulled my hair out, but when i get into these agitated moods i have to whatever i feel like doing--which usually involves leaving, crying, drinking, sacrificing whatever (like a job i like) just to be OUT.
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> is this normal?Sar,
What's normal? And whatever it is, would you want to be it?Sounds like you had an awful experience. In past years (and decades) I have been fired from two jobs with the consequence of losing two careers. Although I was aggrieved at the time, it was pointed out to me that employers are under no obligation to tolerate poor job performance. I might have been able to cite a disability. But I was not fired for being disabled--I was fired for not doing my job. At some point or another I needed to accept this in order to get to the point of not getting fired anymore.
In this thread you have received a number of conjectured diagnoses. I don't know which, if any, are on the mark. But whatever it is, booze don't improve it, but makes it worse. By my drinking a tad more than "normal," I triggered a nearly suicidal depression. Plus,booze never improved the clarity or logic of my thinking but instead guaranteed that I would learn nothing about myself from myself.
Good luck,
galtin
poster:galtin
thread:12411
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011006/msgs/12466.html