Posted by Cecilia on October 13, 2001, at 3:52:44
In reply to Dependence on therapists, posted by Dinah on October 12, 2001, at 20:50:33
> Judy, in the thread above, mentioned that the theory of therapy is that you will get emotionally stronger and the dependence will sort of fade away. That is what my therapist says as well. Does anyone have any experience of that actually happening? Has anyone heard stories of that actually happening? I read In Session as well, and I was left unsure of how often that ideal outcome occurred.
> My own story is that it took five years of therapy to even trust my therapist. I even quit therapy several times. Now, almost a year later, I feel shamefully dependent on him. I see him as a source of safety, a port of peace in the storm. My transference towards him is definitely to see him as a soothing mother. It is bothersome to me as I am perpetually afraid of being terminated. (Boy, was that a freudian slip! - Maybe I still need to work on that trust issue.)
> I can't see myself ever not needing that safety during the down times of depression and anxiety. When I am feeling OK, I don't really need him at all. But during the bad periods, I really don't seem capable of soothing myself.
> I have of course talked about this with him, and he has been very professional and nice about it. He just insists that it will work itself. Somehow I don't find that terribly reassuring.I think therapy is incredibly addicting. I was in therapy for 7 years and was constantly terrified that my therapist would abandon me (even though I never felt the therapy was helping me ). Eventually, in the best tradition of self-fulfilling prophecies, she got fed up with my inability to trust and therapy ended in a session of mutual anger. That was over 4 years ago and it still hurts so much. Obviously, the whole thing didn`t go according to the theories for me. I hope you have better luck.
poster:Cecilia
thread:12459
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011006/msgs/12464.html