Posted by Kingfish on August 15, 2001, at 17:49:07
In reply to my bags are packed, I am ready to go, posted by susan C on August 15, 2001, at 17:36:44
> I think Susan's idea is a good one if you don't mind going with others (and it sounds like it gives you some good direction).
Regardless, I've learned recently, that you both have to be willing to strip the marriage down at a certain point and start over. I think that point differs with couples, and I think it happens over and over again in good relationships. I don't like to talk, so this is difficult for me.
I've tried to be more forthright and ask people with "successful" marriages how they have done it, to find the common factors since my marriage almost ended last spring. I don't know. We haven't been together as long - nine years - but those together longer, such as Susan's marriage, 30 years or more, seemed to say something similar to her. It has to be done again and again. You fall in and out of love in marriage throughout your life. No marriage is really all "that great". (My mother. :) )
I wouldn't over-analyze the depression versus the marriage. If you believe it to have a biological component, you would still have problems with depression despite the marriage. You would feel fine, but would still question the marriage. I did for awhile...
poster:Kingfish
thread:8862
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010812/msgs/9677.html