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headache

Posted by sar on July 11, 2001, at 2:59:07

what the hell happened?

i know i shouldn't be posting this, but it's an anonymous board for support, right? curious for opinions on this one.

i drove to Town X to see my psych today, it was nothing heavy, I left content, then went to where i used to live, a house thats been burned and condemned, fenced off. i tore wood and glass and my hands were bleeding by the time i got in. i looked through all of my old things.

then there was a squatter. a bum, a guy who'd been sleeping in the house ten days, okay looking but not great, and with three tallboys in my tummy i somehow manage to convince myself that the squatter was my friend M and had sex with him...i even forgot that i had my period...ugh, i can't believe i'm posting this, but then he was gone and i drove home as i drank more beers and i've awoken in the middle of the night with a drunk headache wondering what the hell happened. i'd look up and see the length of the bum's hair and really think that it was M.

i feel like throwing up.

time for a klonopin, more water, and a cigarette. my hands hurt and i feel like i don't know myself.

i feel ugly.


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poster:sar thread:7299
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010706/msgs/7299.html