Posted by Adam on November 21, 2000, at 21:51:29
In reply to Need Some Advice, posted by Adam on November 21, 2000, at 19:13:44
Noa,
I'm aware that cutting is by no means always an attention-getting ploy, nor a clear diagnostic. I think it's the package that makes me suspect b.p.d. or worse. I do appreciate your measured response though, and also want to apologize, in advance, to any and all who might think I am inclined to view any with such severe difficulties in a dim light. My feelings are, to be sure, colored considerably by my udeniable dislike of this person, who, strangely enough, on the couple occasions that we met, seemed quite personable and not in any way in distress. I guess the latter especially shouldn't suprise me, given my own troubles. However, the impression one gets of this guy at first, contrasted with what I have learned about his behavior, leaves me freaked out, for lack of a better term. I've got a VERY bad feeling about this guy. I know the "darkness in men's souls" if you will. I'm not myself guiltless of desperate behavior due to severe emotional distress, though nothing like what I can imagine a person could be capable of. This guy seems like all the human contradictions that have ever kept me up at night in horrible introspection magnified 100 times, and that ain't good, in my estimation.
coral, I think you may be right, even if we are both wrong in our assessment of this particular person: This is no time to not use vigilance and to preempt any possible legal challenges. I think she is largely if not completely shielded from responsibility for his losing his job, since A) She's not his boss, and B) he himself resigned. Do you know, though, if a person can be said to have been "not of sound mind" when having made such a move, and thus able to reverse it regardless of the employer's intent? How can one stop such a ploy, if it could be attempted? How do they finesse his self-initiated termination without seeming like callous opportunists looking to jettison a troubled but righteous individual denied his due? As sick as it sounds, this (oh I am tempted to use some unpleasant epithets here) _person_ has some people in the organization convinced that The Management are a bunch of self-serving buffoons. His "gamesmanship", though not very adept, is to not have ever done anthing criminally wrong (as far as anyone can tell) up to this point, though he certainly has behaved in a deplorably unethical manner, as far as I'm concerned.
Shite. One can really imagine some serious doomsday scenerios here, and it seems like the really tough job is to react in the proper measure, discretely and decisively, so that those in the organization, who shouldn't be concerned with these sticky details, know little or nothing about any possible legal actions taken, and that nothing that could come back and bite you in the arse later isn't overlooked.
And last, but not least, as thoroughly unsympathetic as I feel toward this person, how do you make sure he doesn't end up in some irredeemable predicament? I think Noa had it right with sympathetic gestures made in a non-work-related capacity, but what?
poster:Adam
thread:3090
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001117/msgs/3122.html