Posted by shar on October 11, 2000, at 22:17:22
In reply to Me! Me!! ME!!! I've done that!, posted by Racer on October 11, 2000, at 20:21:02
That is a wonderful and thought-provoking question. While Racer has periods of "normalcy" between bouts of depression, mine has been a constant in my life since teen years (that's about 30 years worth).
I guess I look at it like, in the past 20 or 10 or 1 year(s) I have made progress in being able to have a little self-love (like taking care of myself physically, or at least not harming myself) and coming to terms with a lot of trauma and abuse I experienced and sort of giving it a place inside me, but not having it be the only place there is or the most important place. And letting myself have my feelings, and being sober. Things like that.
So, even though I may have been depressed and suicidal while accomplishing some things, I got on to a better path. And that I did not do without a healthy dose of divine intervention, prayer, meditation, etc.
The real me is the totality of the person writing this. Tonight, a little tired, but not hating the fact that tomorrow will come. Still with wounds to heal (some old, some new) and lots to learn. A survivor with a life of my own, things I'm grateful for, and a teeny flame of hope for the future.
Shar
poster:shar
thread:990
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001011/msgs/995.html