Posted by shadowmon on February 4, 2009, at 0:06:14
In reply to Re: Beginning a new relationship triggered anxiety/dep » nfc, posted by daisydoo on February 2, 2009, at 4:04:44
> Hey there. I signed up specifically to respond to your post - What palava! So ....anyway it was last year that you posted but I just wanted to tell you I am facing similar issues. Sometimes anxiety can mask the real feelings we have for someone. I too have been out with lots of guys, only to end it in a very short time because I just couldn't deal with the anxiety I was feeling. Eeryone talks about how 'in love' they are and how exciting it all is. All I feel is like screaming.
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> It gets to a point where you just can't deal with it anymore a. I think for me a lot of it is the pressure I put on myself. Ie 'if this relationship doesn't work out I will be alone forever' or 'what if I get too scared and lose something potentially amazing' or 'I don't want to hurt him!' ....These are things that constantly go through my mind and it gets so intense that I sometimes just want to end the relationship. I guess you've got to chose between intense anxiety (hoping that eventually it will wear off) or that hopeless depressed feeling you feel after you dump yet another boyfriend.
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> It is a really terrible feeling isn't it? Akll your friends are really excited for you! But all you feel like doing is dying really.
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> And the worst thing....it seems that NOONE understands! So thankyou so much for your post. I am currently seeing a wonderful guy (it's been a week) and I am so anxious it's not funny. But I am trying not to put to much pressure on myself. I keep telling myself....yes I am very anxious but lets see if I can deal with that without getting rid of this amazing guy. I am also seeing a psychologist about it which helps.
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> I figure if I can deal with this...I can deal with anything. The ultimate battle of the mind!!!
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> Tell me how it is going....
>Yes, thank you for showing me that I am not the only person who feels this way. Unfortunately my relationship did not work out, and now I am going through this grief/depression thing, which at least I know will eventually get better. But I read your post and almost started crying because all of those thoughts would go through my mind and they would not stop. But I pushed myself through it and I am glad that I did and dont regret pushing myself (although I do regret trying to change medications at the same time). All I can suggest is that you don't do exactly what I did and just push forward, take time to listen to your intuition. It was hard for me because I couldnt tell what the difference was between unwarranted anxiety and intuition, but I am slowly learning to trust my intuition once again.
It sucks having the anxiety though, it's hard to discern between unwarranted anxiety and what is real intuition (as I learned)
Good luck with your relationship, and if you need to talk, would love to communicate with someone who understands the feeling. :)
poster:shadowmon
thread:820095
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20071110/msgs/877928.html