Posted by DannaB on February 15, 2007, at 21:42:05
Yet another post about my my back-and-forth relationship! We keep almost breaking up. I love this guy. I want to make it work. But we seem to have very different ideas about a relationship.
I want someone who treasures me. Who makes me feel special. Who wants to share the "daily things" in his life with me.
He has a lot going on in his life and seems to want a relationship that is "easy." He was in an abusive relationship previously and is extremely sensitive to the idea of being pushed or manipulated. He seems to want "no demands," as in no expectation that he call or treat me a certain way. He doesn't respond well to my requests for more attention and communication. Actually, the more I request the less he gives.
Our troubles started once we had gotten more serious, and I overreacted about a couple things (a tendency of mine due to anxiety) when I was going through a very stressful time. He said this made him worry that I would be like his ex. Prior to this he was a great boyfriend. He accepted my apology for overreacting, but we just aren't as close as before.
I have tried to chill out, but I just can't deal with getting the "leftovers" of his attention. It makes me feel unappreciated. I have asked him to be more expressive about how he feels about me and to call me more and show me that he cares--things he did when we first started dating.
I am so scared to lose him. I don't understand why he can't give me a little more. I *know* that he cares about me...after all, we keep fighting yet we keep staying together. So why won't he try to meet me halfway? I would appreciate your thoughts and/or advice, but please be gentle as I'm a little bit sensitive and worry that I've done something "wrong."
poster:DannaB
thread:733187
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20070210/msgs/733187.html