Posted by Jost on October 30, 2006, at 22:40:37
In reply to Single gal jealous of friends in relationships, posted by Asya on October 29, 2006, at 15:31:21
Hi, Asya.
I can't say whether it's healthy per se, although I don't imagine that distancing yourself from people will be good in the long term.
Perhaps you also feel left out, since your friends are less available--so some of the pain is that of rejection, as well as envy-- And perhaps they find it harder to empathize (or identify with) your feelings of skepticism or perhaps ambivalence about relationships. So this is a real loss for you-- as well as a marker that you are not accomplishing something (or finding something) that you value.
On the off-chance that you have some personal struggles--things from your past that make relationships with men difficult (otherwise why would you be on a site called psychobabble?)-- I'd encourage you to consider therapy.
It could help a lot to explore your own psyche in that way--much more than talking to friends -- who understand, but may not be able to really help you understand, or work on, whatever's in the way.
Friends are great-- don't get me wrong-- crucial-- but sometimes it takes someone who's thought about how people change and grow-- and how people come to be as they are-- and who knows you perhaps more deeply than even friends may-- to make real changes in direction.
If you're a physician, you perhaps have resources for referrals-- and I think that might be the way to go.
Jost
poster:Jost
thread:698777
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/699221.html