Posted by karen_kay on October 24, 2006, at 11:20:13
or so i've been told. girlfriend, i guess it works for. or being cryptic (is he calling me old?) don't make for a good wife. cold and aloof don't make for a good wife. one dimension of kk isn't good enough (now, i'd think having even one dimension of me would be enough for anyone).
yeah, i think about things a lot too. but i sometimes think about what eating a whole jar of mustard would be like, and i don't feel the need to share that (why would i anyway? am i supposed to jsut shout out "cookie" if the word happens to enter my mind?) and how could i even put some of the thoughts in my head into words? i don't even know why i think of half the things i do.
and the whole "you don't love me as much as i love you" bit keeps coming back up (nto the first time i've heard that anyway and you'd think by now i'd have found the right answer) and i could use my 'people skills' to answer exactly they way he wants me to. because i don't even know what to say to something like that. but i don't think he wants the real answer. i don't even know what the real answer is.
and the whole "i don't want you wondering if maybe there is someone out there you'd be able to love as much as i love you" what's the perfect answer to that one?
people skills can only get you so far in a relationship, i guess. with all of these thoughts (my brain can handle no more than the alphabet and simple math problems) is it any wonder i want a glass of wine by 10 am? is it any wonder i talk around quest5ions rather than answer them? is it any wonder i feel out of sorts lately? (and why can't i talk to him about it? oh yeah, because i don't know exactly what he wants to hear and god forbid i say the wrong thing, right?)
now i feel a little better and will continue with my milk (even though there's wine whiskey AND guinness in the kitchen. i'll give that until 4 at least :)
i just don't even know what people want or expect from me anymore? (geez, that's not really a question but maybe it is?) with my son it's easy to tell (oh, but i AM capable of 'that'[ kind of love because he sees it in my interaction with our son. another topic on another day)anyone had this conversation before and found the perfect answer? because answering these questions everyday honestly would give different answers everyday. no, consistency is not my strong suit.
poster:karen_kay
thread:697306
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/697306.html