Posted by llrrrpp on August 25, 2006, at 10:04:47
In reply to Re: No one to complain to » llrrrpp, posted by curtm on August 25, 2006, at 9:04:24
I'm Expectatious too.
T has helped me figure out that I have unreasonable expectations. I believe in some law of cause and effect that doesn't really exist. I EXPECT people to play nice, just because I do. Wrong. Sorry. Go to Jail. Do Not Pass Go. Do Not Collect 200 dollars.
Recognition doesn't come for every single thing we do. Does your spouse/children receive recognition for all of their contributions to family life?
Emotional and physical love are wonderful. You deserve these, of course. Hugs and Kisses are an inexpensive and precious gift to you. Why do you think they are being rationed? Is it because this is the only tool your spouse has to get you to help with housework?
I'm starting to see a vicious pattern here. Curt wants hugs and kisses, and won't help until he gets them, or at least a promise of them in the future. Spouse withholds hugs and kisses because otherwise she has no power over Curt. Uh oh.
What can you guys do to break this cycle?
-ll
poster:llrrrpp
thread:678987
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060621/msgs/679952.html