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Re: female input » jonquiljo

Posted by Tamar on December 7, 2005, at 7:43:59

In reply to Re: female input, posted by jonquiljo on December 6, 2005, at 22:09:13

> Oh, my wife has a severely degenerative spinal condition. Her pain and other issues are such that it is out of the question. Perhaps if things get better, perhaps not.

Gosh, that sounds tough. Yes, pain is really a serious problem.

> Its difficult for me in many ways, but it is infinitely more difficult for her. Oh well, at least I can talk about it.

I’m sure it is difficult for her. Is it something you’ve talked about with her? I know pain can be very debilitating, but sometimes sexual activity (and particularly orgasm) can help both with pain and with a general sense of life being worthwhile. Maybe penetrative sex is out of the question, but are there other things you can do for each other?

I would guess there’s little enough enjoyment in life with a serious medical condition; giving up one’s sexuality seems like too much on top of giving up so many other things. And yet, of course, it’s hard to feel sexy when there’s a lot of pain and physical damage. And doctors aren’t always very clued up about it… I think they often see sexuality as an optional factor in life, rather than as something that can make a huge difference to a patient’s state of mind and ability to recover or to cope with illness.

I’m sorry it’s so difficult for you both.



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poster:Tamar thread:580676
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20051204/msgs/586411.html