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Re: Single and (maybe) desperate . . . straw poll

Posted by Racer on August 31, 2005, at 0:33:26

In reply to Single and (maybe) desperate . . . straw poll, posted by quietheart on August 9, 2005, at 16:56:57

> I was wondering what you all think of the following:
>
> 1) What would be your best advice about how to find that one person?

Don't look too single-mindedly. I met my husband at a point in my life when I wanted one thing: casual dating. I'd been in a relationship for a long time, and really wanted a chance to learn what I wanted, what I liked, what I was capable of.

Best laid plans and all that, we were living together within six months.

> 2) Do you believe being single is unnatural?

No. I tend to think that there's a huge variation in what's "natural."

> 3) Do you believe one can make it work with a broad range of people if he/she tries?

Yes, and no. You can make it work with a range of people, but only if you're not "settling" for your partner. Trust me, I tried to settle and it just doesn't work.

> 4) At what age do you think a person should give up trying?

At death. Seriously, there's no age to give up trying, especially since after a certain time you tend to care a bit less, which tends to make you more attractive. Bit of a conundrum, what?

> 5) If one hasn't met that certain someone, do you think moving to a metropolis where there would be a greater chance of meeting someone is a wise decision or desperate?

What else is there for you in this metropolis? That's the real question. Moving simply in hopes of meeting a partner is rather desperate, and likely to be an unhappy decision. What happens if you're in this new place, not meeting anyone, and without your familiar places and faces? That's misery.

> 6) Do you think some people are meant to be single?

Yes, but they tend to live in small huts in the woods and file their teeth to sharp points. (Or their lips move when they watch TV. Take your pick...)

> 7) What do you recommend for someone who, in her late twenties, hasn't been in a serious relationship?

Relax. Cultivate your interests, get involved in community activities -- especially volunteer work -- and enjoy your life. Those things not only help you feel good about your life while single, they also make you about six times more attractive.

I hope this helps a bit. Good luck.


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