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Re: I need help, please tell me if I am abnormal » asya

Posted by Tamar on June 7, 2005, at 5:43:54

In reply to I need help, please tell me if I am abnormal, posted by asya on June 6, 2005, at 21:30:26

> Hi all,
> I am hoping someone can shed some light on my situation without judging. I am a 26 year old professional. I live alone and have a great job. I consider myself well-liked at work. I don't have any serious social phobias etc. But outside of work, I don't really have a life. My clsoe friends from hs and college live hundreds of miles away and I speak to them often on the phone. My family lives about a half hour away and I see them about once a week on average. But every day I come home after work, eat some dinner, watch TV, check email, talk on the phone sometimes, and go to bed. Once in a while (maybe once every two weeks) I have dinner with a friend/friends from work. In terms of dating, I have been with a few people and been intimate, but never had sex (basically in the everything but intercourse category). I am registered on an internet dating site and talk to people from the site sometimes on the phone until I can meet them. (It is a cultural community dating site so the people don't necessarily live in my area). I feel like a so-called "loser." Am I abnormal? is this life abnormal? Please help me.

I don't think you're abnormal, but I'd guess you're lonely and a bit bored. Many people your age want to have an exciting social life. Can you get a room mate? Join a book group? Go to dancing classes? Take up some kind of sport? If you feel nervous about going to something new all by yourself, try to persuade a friend to go with you. It's easier to get to know new people if you have a common aim (like team sport or an astronomy club or whatever). And if you start to do something like that, you'll have more to talk about with potential partners...

I definitely don't think you're a loser, but I think you'll probably feel happier if you go out more.


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