Posted by ron1953 on November 2, 2004, at 7:20:26
In reply to 52 yo Widower, whats worse being alone or dating, posted by bethesdabob on October 29, 2004, at 17:47:48
Bob:
Being a 51-year-old divorcee after nearly 30 years of marriage, I can relate to your question. I've been separated for 1-1/2 years. The dating scene sucks. I tried Match, had a few pointless dates and gave up on that method. I went to some singles dances with a friend, too. Besides the fact that that I can't dance, the noisy scene was basically the same as the meat market bar scene. I also felt like damaged goods because of my depression problems and career/financial problems. So I reconciled myself to simply stop actively searching, and attend to other matters. I figured I'd eventually meet someone through a friend, at a future job, wherever. Just when I was getting comfortable with this decision, I "connected" with a woman on a site similar to Babble. She's been separated for about the same amount of time as me, and also wasn't actively looking for a potential partner. Maybe the fact that we *weren't* looking allowed us to see each other.
I'll spare you the details but we found a great deal in common and found love that is better than any we've experienced before. We're helping each other heal. We each feel joy again, replacing the numbness we felt before. We fully accept each other as we are. All good stuff.
So fear not, Bob. It'll happen. But it seems you can't force it or put it on a timetable.
Ron
poster:ron1953
thread:408852
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041015/msgs/410492.html