Posted by b2chica on February 22, 2012, at 12:41:36
i have to remember that sometimes my feelings though real are also illusions. in that they will pass with time. the truth stands buried behind them.
i am feeling very suicidal right now. i took some extra gabapentin to slow me down so that i dont act on anything rash.
i want to leave work and act.
i dont want to go to hospital. as i will pretend to be fine. i cant afford another hospital stay.
we have no money.sometimes i truly think i'm better off dead.
my family will be provided for.
******************but i realize i'm irreplaceable in my childrens lives. i cant do that to them.
i'm torn and my heart aches.i have no one to talk to.
what do i do.
if i can stay here at work and not leave i will be ok.
i can imagine but i cant act.i want to take more pills.
i want to slit my wrists.
i want to breath toxins.
i want to drown.
i want to place cold steel to my head and pull.i want to sleep.
i want to be loved.
i want to be needed and appreciated.
i want to be help.
i want to make a difference.
i want to make peoples lives better.i want to be with God.
i want to go home...
poster:b2chica
thread:1011195
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20120217/msgs/1011195.html