want it to end

Posted by Annabelle Smith on April 28, 2011, at 15:17:24

In reply to doesn't know, posted by Annabelle Smith on April 28, 2011, at 15:06:51

I feel so enraged and stuck.
I really, for everything within me, don't know what the F*CK is wrong with me.
Nothing. There is nothing wrong with me.
There is nothing that I can physically point to and say here: here is my addiction
or here is my past trauma
or here is my specific struggle.
I don't have any secrets that I'm hiding.
I am just in hell. It's not depression. It's not anxiety. Everyone tells me it is both of these things just to shut me up-- but I know better.
It is like being haunted by something inarticulable, like being possessed by a demon-- but the demon is me.
There is nothing the F*CK wrong with me.
I want the F*CK out.
out.
I want out of this f*ck*d up life and world.

Dear God help.
I am losing my f*ck*ng mind.

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Sisyphus Annabelle Smith 4/28/11
Re: Sisyphus Dinah 4/28/11
doesn't know Annabelle Smith 4/28/11
want it to end Annabelle Smith 4/28/11
Re: doesn't know Dinah 4/28/11
Re: doesn't know sigismund 4/28/11

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