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A self-care opportunity/a teaching opportunity » Dinah

Posted by Kath on November 24, 2009, at 9:19:19

In reply to Re: Sliding towards meltdown » TherapyGirl, posted by Dinah on November 21, 2009, at 14:46:55

Dear Dinah - I'm so sorry that you are suffering so much.

> I'm feeling a little bit better today. That will last as long as I don't hear from her.

~ ~ ((you)) Sounds like things have come to a head. The problem is, you Will hear from her.
:-(

It really sounds to me as though you DO want to break ties. I hope you're able to do this, with your T's help Dinah. You, your husband & your son deserve the 'you' who you'll be able to once you've freed yourself from the poisonous relationship. (Which I know nothing about, but it's obvious it's harming you bigtime.)

> I hate that I behaved badly yesterday. I hate to do that. It's so strange that even though I could recognize that an hysterical outburst was on my horizon, I still couldn't stop it.

~ ~ Please try to let go of shame or guilt about this. In my opinion, it's a perfectly normal & natural & probably healthy thing to have happened under the circumstances. I think it's a direct parallel to this physical situation:

A person has a build-up of toxins in their system. The toxins build up & manifest themselves in 1 place as a boil. They continue to build up & eventually the poison releases as the boil bursts. Quite normal & natural &, under the circumstances, healthy.

To take it to the next step, it'd be great if the person could eliminate toxins to whatever degree they can, in order to prevent further boils.

I know it's easier said than done.

(((You)))

Very best of luck & strength in this. You deserve to be treated WELL Dinah. It sounds like you really want to make a break. I suspect it won't be at all easy.

One thing that's helped me sometimes to do things that are hard, is to know that my children are watching me & learning from me. In taking good care of yourself, you're teaching your son that it's good & important to take care of himself. By removing yourself from a situation where you're being treated poorly, you'd be teaching your son that in life, if he's in a situation where people are NOT treating him well, the thing to do is do what he needs to, to change that situation so that he's not being treated poorly.

I send you love, Kath

 

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poster:Kath thread:926316
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20091022/msgs/926806.html