Posted by Garnet71 on September 12, 2009, at 7:00:24
In reply to Is your therapist nurturing?, posted by rickjen on September 9, 2009, at 19:22:18
I wouldn't say my T is "nurturing", but he talks a lot and acknowledges my feelings, and through his talking I can clearly see his empathy and desire to help; he also gives me reassurance about my fears-he said "if you want reassurance, I'll give you reassurance" when I was indirectly asking for reassurance. I also told him I don't want someone to "tell me what I want to hear", that I always wanted to hear the truth, and he doesn't sugar coat anything but that is his style anyway, he told me. Most previous Ts did that type of nurturing, validating me and being agreeable all the time, and I didn't like it. I'd rather have someone confront me and challenge me than nuture me.
Some people need or want nuturing in therapy, others don't. If nurturing would be helpful to you, you could bring this up to your T. I am comfortable with a less-nuturing T-as long as the T showed empathy, was talkative, and provided some kind of feedback on a regular basis. It's annoying to me when Ts say nothing. Even if a T is not warm and fuzzy, one that provides a lot of feedback and interpretations can enable a patient feel cared for. The latter is what I prefer.
Being silent just doesn't seem helpful. But it could be your T is trying to learn your core issues before making interpretations, and will later be more active. Decide if nuturing is what you need - or is it just a T being active and talkative what you need?
poster:Garnet71
thread:916241
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090907/msgs/916624.html