Posted by backseatdriver on February 24, 2009, at 13:09:53
In reply to Re: I am hopeless, helpless, and want to die. » Looney Tunes, posted by raisinb on February 24, 2009, at 7:59:21
LT,
I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I want to second the thought someone posted above, that not all Ts are like this.
_Narcissism and the Psychotherapist_ is a good book that explains why some bad therapists take advantage of their vulnerable clients. The book's basic message is: Ts come to their professions with plenty of baggage and not all of it gets worked through before they start treating clients.
Alas, the most disturbed Ts are sometimes also the most empathic. This is one reason it is so easy to get embroiled with a bad T. They seem to "get you" right away. And it's true, they do understand a great deal, but lack the skills and insight needed to put that understanding in the service of YOUR health and happiness. Which is their job.
I wish I knew how to tell in advance which empathic Ts are good at this, and which are not.
Another sad fact: These dangerous people often DO manage to find the MOST empathic and vulnerable clients, people who have been trained from early life to look after the needs of cherished others in order to ensure their own survival.
Please hear this: This is not your fault. I am vulnerable this way, too. It is very hard to find empathic therapists who are not tempted to use me for their own needs. My current T tends to offend in this way, but he is good about recognizing the violations when they happen, and he apologizes with conviction, which means a lot.
Wishing you peace and healing. Your strength gives me hope.
Yours,
BSD
poster:backseatdriver
thread:881951
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/882182.html