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Reflections (could be **triggering**)

Posted by Wittgensteinz on December 22, 2008, at 10:02:09

As it's nearly the end of another year, I thought I would pose this question:

What were the most memorable moments between you and your therapist over the past year? What sticks in your mind (positive - or negative)?

Are there any milestones you feel you have reached and could share?

It's funny but I think my nicest moments with my T have been those of silence - those moments just after a revelation of some kind where we have shared a magical silence together, maybe held eye contact for a few seconds - where I've felt understood and cared for. No particular example comes to mind though, just that feeling it gave me. I hope to have many more of those moments in the future.

Of course coming round in hospital sticks in the mind too - the shock and thinking "what have I gone and done?!" - then my T being there and looking so uncomfortable, and my fear he wouldn't continue seeing me anymore.

One of my least productive sessions this last year was when I brought my dog with me (a chocolate labradoodle) (she was about 6 months old at the time) - we had painters working on our house so it wasn't possible to leave her at home. I let her free and she explored his office, stole tissues from his waste paper bin and jumped on the divan. He was surprisingly tolerant considering. I didn't get much deep talking done though.

I'm quite sure I've made progress although I feel at this moment that the state of the relationship between my T and I is not as strong or close as it was some months ago. I still feel my S attempt at the end of the summer has caused some irreparable damage - but I don't know to what extent that is just my feeling. I am rather hard on myself.

I feel less enmeshed in my past, I still have a lot to work on but I've surprised myself by managing and enjoying studying again - once again motivated toward a goal, not nearly as terrified of 'other people' as I was some months ago. So I guess my self-esteem is that little bit better. I've been seeing my T for 20 months now there abouts.

Ok, this was long enough. I'd love to read how others are reflecting on their year...

Witti

 

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poster:Wittgensteinz thread:870249
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/870249.html