Posted by Wittgensteinz on November 12, 2008, at 11:35:11
In reply to Re: Still all out of sorts » Partlycloudy, posted by rskontos on November 11, 2008, at 21:44:09
(((((PC))))) and (((((Rskontos)))))
I'm so sorry you are going through what you are. I went through a period of about 2 or 3 months of something that seems similar (this was before I came to babble) - insomnia, overwhelming anxiety, sensory overload - in that period I actually put up a tent in my living room (!!) with a duvet thrown over it to block out any light. Inside the tent I had all nice soft things. When I was in too much pain, and it was really unbearable psychic pain, I would crawl into the tent and wrap myself up as tight as possible. Now you probably think I am completely crazy! But this creating a safe place, a place where you don't have to be confronted by all your senses screaming at you, this really helped me in any case. It was a time when all my wounds had been opened up and I couldn't take it - all these things I had not thought about or recalled once since they had happened, suddenly were dancing a show in front of me in vivid detail - the vividness and the speed at which my mind was going - it was inescapable and terrifying. This did go over in time (and I know you both face different wounds) but it did pass - gradually its intensity lessened - the feelings would come in waves of pain and each time would subside that little bit sooner. In the midst of it, it was unbearable - I tried many things - a bath before bed, following a ritual of sorts to wind down before trying to sleep (I would walk out into the middle of a dark field and be alone for a little while, listening to the sounds of the night, feel the wind on my face) - giving myself space and trying to clear my thoughts - I also took Lorazopan, which helped but was only for short-term use. The days seemed to blur into one at that point. Finally, I slept in my own bed, separate from my partner during this time - might seem a bit anti-social but it did help me to (try to) get a good night's sleep, and it also meant I didn't feel guilty if I got up in the night. I remember at the time thinking to myself that this pain was something that one could not possibly understand unless one had experienced it - it was inconceivable to me until I was going through it.
I really feel for you both and want you to know that you are in my thoughts. I hope this difficult time begins to pass, so you can start to heal. You are both incredibly strong people in my eyes - I hope you can find peace.
Witti
poster:Wittgensteinz
thread:862351
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081104/msgs/862530.html