Posted by seldomseen on May 9, 2008, at 9:16:47
In reply to Re: back from vacation... realizations abaout ther » seldomseen, posted by Happyflower on May 9, 2008, at 9:03:17
HF, you wouldn't believe how seeing him more has helped. He even said seeing me more right now was a good idea. I'm actually enjoying my time with him. We are talking about heavy stuff no doubt, but it's good.
I indicated this week that the stuff I was talking about felt like poison and that I didn't want to cause him a moment's grief over my crappy life. I worry about him sometimes.
He looked at me and said. "it's not poison, it's your life. Seldom, you can not expect me not to grieve for you and with you. I will. But i'm not afraid of how it makes me feel and I will go through this with you."
HF, i've been living two very distinct lives. One, the consummate professional competent woman, the other as horribly abused child. These two lives have met before, but have never spent any quality time together.
They are integrating now. It feels like two lakes coming together. At first there was a lot of violence and energy with the waters meeting. Now it feels more like a gradual flowing together and settling out. It's overwhelmingly sad.
But i'm making it - thanks for asking.
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:827980
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080508/msgs/828155.html