Posted by DAisym on April 7, 2008, at 12:18:04
In reply to Re: Something hard to talk about » Dinah, posted by Happyflower on April 7, 2008, at 10:48:50
Over the course your therapy, and your changing, I'm sure your husband has changed some too. And I find it interesting that you wrote about moving to a more relaxed, real and sort of intimate place with your therapist and then this comes up. I doubt strongly that your husband is jealous in a "sexual" way - you are just so clear that you aren't attracted to your therapist.
But I'm wondering if he is feeling left out a bit. There is a such a strong emotional connection between you and your therapist, and like you said, he meets needs your husband doesn't. But more than that, there is that vague kind of feeling that sometimes descends that is about sharing - I can imagine your husband sometimes feeling this way. Very much, as you said, like when your attention is diverted to the dogs. Like kids when their mom is nice to their friends, sometimes they forget that love and attention stretches. What someone else gets, doesn't take away from what you have to give to them.
I'm wondering if there is anything going on with your husband that makes him need you more right now? And I'm also wondering how much you talk about therapy with him? I absolutely couldn't talk about therapy with my x-husband. He felt embarrassed and invaded by "some guy" that I was telling stuff too. And he didn't understand the need, because I didn't need him.
Seems like you are doing the right things by talking about it. And maybe you need to quietly increase the attention to your husband for a bit.
poster:DAisym
thread:822011
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080405/msgs/822033.html