Posted by frida on February 18, 2008, at 13:33:02
In reply to Re: Therapy - Bang for the Buck?, posted by Hermitian on February 18, 2008, at 10:39:37
I must say i don't agree with the points you've expressed...
I guess it's hard for someone who hasn't understood or been thereWhen you've been tortured for 15 years, every day, of course it takes time to build trust. Yes, it takes years for some. It took me a year and a bit more to even tell my T i had been s.a by my father for that long. And what happened during that year wasn't "nothing". It was building trust, something i had had shattered for years at home.
Maybe you are not considering that past trauma doesn't just go away and stays in the past. It affects your every day life and issues. It isn't something you talk about some sessions, or a year, and then that's it, it doesn't affect you anymore. It is there, and it affects what happens in your life.
Even though it is valid to hear that was then, this is now..that doesn't solve things. I find it much more helpful to talk about things so i can truly feel that way and what is happening now that is triggering something from those issues stops happening or gets better. My T has plenty experience and i find it a little hurtful that you say that that kind of treatment style would be "greedy" or "lazy".
My T has done so much for me to help me talk and heal some of the scars of childhood sexual abuse.I agree that we have family (well, not everyone has) and friends, but a T's role is much different and the relationships we form are unique.
You say "Tell her the banks closed, youre outta cash and see how long that love lasts".My T would continue seeing me and I'd pay her when i can. I've done that when I've been in finantial troubles. She waited for me for months and one year I just couldn't pay everything, and she told me that she valued my effort and to accept that I was paying as much as i could and that was fine for her. I know she genuinely cares about me and she has told me that a thousand times. I know that if i couldn't pay that love wouldn't just go away. We'd find a way for me to see her if i needed to.
I don't know if you were asking me, or someone else, but when I entered therapy, i wanted to find a way to feel worthwhile and to feel it was ok for me to be alive. i wanted someone to help me stop feeling dead inside.
and i found that...
yes, i've been in T for 8 years. But 15 years of being hurt, plus years of internalizing those 'teachings', take time to overcome.There are very good T's out there , and long-term therapy works for a lot of people.
Maybe it just doesn't for you, but it does for a lot of us.If you haven't experienced this, I guess it's very hard to understand.
Frida
poster:frida
thread:813285
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080210/msgs/813455.html