Posted by seldomseen on December 18, 2007, at 8:42:54
In reply to Nuther thing, posted by muffled on December 17, 2007, at 15:18:05
Muffled,
I may be way off base, but I have a theory about what is happening here.
I think what is happening to you and what you are doing is about power and control. I suspect the only models you have had about power and control have been those who exerted this by physical force. Like "I can gain control of this situation by beating my way out it - see I WON, I have the power now".
I also suspect that you put yourself in these risky situations when you are feeling particularly vulnerable so that you can exert that physical power and control and reassure yourself that you have it. "Yes I am strong, Yes I am the the aggressor, Yes I have the power. I'm not vulnerable and weak - no sir NOT ME"
I think it is natural that you are confused when people express concern and support for you when you hurt or are at your weakest - previously that might have been a signal for an attack! But hopefully this can be a new model for you.
One where people understand vulnerability and recognize how strong one has to be to be vulnerable.
People do love you Muffled and I'm glad you reached out to your T and got home. It's so nice to be picked up when we are down and led to a safe place.
Again, I may be way off base and if I am, I sincerely apologize.
I guess all I wanted to say is that there is hope, and there can be an end to the violence, and that's all I really want for you.
Seldom.
poster:seldomseen
thread:801114
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071215/msgs/801403.html