Posted by rskontos on December 12, 2007, at 18:48:55
In reply to Re: Anybody w/ skits and how are they coping? » rskontos, posted by nfc on December 12, 2007, at 14:19:20
Well nfc, I am only just beginning to understand and I can't switch when I want to they are in charge now. I am suppose to be getting control of things but that isn't going to well. Today I switch to one that is a little wild but nothing happened and now I have a headache. I am not sure about just being one, that is called intergration and I am not really wanting it yet. My peeps protect me right now and I am used to it. Sometimes I can stay and see or rather hear what is going on, sometimes it is like tunnel vision. When I was younger I was gone all the way, no memory of what happened. It is better to be all one part but that is a long hard road. I have started that journey just not sure where it is going.
I am glad you have a better grip on the delusions. My mother had them and what a rough ride as a kid with a delusional mom. She was never medicated. Hey I have loads of stuff to feel guilty over too as one of my peeps well she was bad news but you can't dwell on that. You did what you did. It was not your fault. In my case it was my fault as she is still me. ONly a part I don't know really. Long ago I would have been locked up. Sometimes I think I should be now but I am ok for the most part I still hide, I still dissociate, I am trying to get well. Too many memories are suppressed though. Lots of stuff hidden.I am glad our swapping war stories had helped. Me too. And remember if you ever need a shoulder to lean on or just to talk you can babblemail me too.
Now the girl. I think and this might be hard. But I think you should just chalk this one up to experience, and timing. Now that you are better, go out and find a new girl with no baggage on your side or herself. And go slow, and take your time and start with a movie or coffee or dinner but ask her out and be friends first. that is what I think. You don't need validation. Or if you do, I am validation that you are getting better and don't need to go down that road again. Move forward not backwards. You have a better outlook so find some new friends and a new girl that you can talk to and know firsthand if she likes you.
YOu are worth knowing. You are good person, a good man, and you will be alright. Don't think about the out you gave her and yourself. If it comes then ok. But dont spend anymore time or energy focusing on it focus on moving forward.
Ok.....you have a job, that is a plus, now get some therapy going, stay focused on getting better and doing well and you will meet someone worthwhile that wants to know you!!! I know this to be true.....Glad to be of help sir......I will take care, later,
rk
poster:rskontos
thread:799641
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071204/msgs/800415.html