Posted by rskontos on November 29, 2007, at 10:35:27
In reply to Re: Re; inside kids**mebbe triggers** » twinleaf, posted by Muffled on November 29, 2007, at 0:16:28
Hey Muffled, I understand truly. I was having a really good day. I best I have had in soooooooo long and out of no where rises up these feelings of such hurt and anger I can't control and I lash out like a mad banshee. I don't see my parts yet, I have the feelings. Real Me told me that on a post here, you can find it if you want to look, that sometimes the inner kids dont talk but have tons of feelings that don't get out. I have thought 'bout that and I think, for me, maybe others, that they can't talk cuz they hurt so much and they let loose with their feelings and their feelings are so mixed up and hurt and angry and you feel all those emotions and it is like they have no place to go. You as the adult have to try to find a place for them. I confess I have not be good at this either. I too have a long way to go. I almost dumped my T. Long Story. My point is it so hard to deal with our parts because they are part of us yet separate. They have a separate memory, set of feelings, hurts, physical hurts sometimes, anger, and sadness. When you take all those different parts and add them up plus the adult you it can be overwhelming. And add in a IRL life to boot to try and juggle. Kids a husband a job a home whatever and suddenly life seems like it is too much. I found a song, I have been meaning to type up the words and post. I have been playing it over and over for myself and in my head. I can do that. I found have conversations with my inner voices and play a song in my head to sooth them. It works sometimes. Sometimes not. Anyway, this song says alot of what I am mean. I will post it for all. It is what is helping me come back.
Muffled you are a good person with a lot going on. When I explain to my good friend a small fraction of what is going on with me it sounds so crazy I want to stop. She understands and it is ok but it hurts me to talk about it. I sound crazy to me. To parts of me. I hurt to think of parts gone but to continue like this is hard too. I know that we will find our way, we always do but the going does get tough and rocky at times. We do need to vent however it sounds. You have PERMISSION to do so. I found for myself I needed it. I guess it is that inner kid that needs everything to be ok or she will run and hide. The danger we must remember was a LONG time ago this is the healing which hurts to go through but in the long run will be good and safe and right.
Hang in there sweets, it will be ok. for all of you.....rk
poster:rskontos
thread:797528
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071120/msgs/797584.html