Posted by B2chica on September 24, 2007, at 8:43:28
In reply to i'm gonna puke, posted by Dory on September 24, 2007, at 7:18:34
Hi Dory....
not sure if you left already for your appt. but i hope it goes/went well.i know how that feels. but all i can say is if i throwup in real life i always feel better afterwards....the same thing if you emotionally throwup. which i've done several times in session.
it starts to build...i think your body realizes that you are finally at a place where you can and need to start talking about trauma. and it builds up terribly inside...then it gets kinda bottlenecked. then, soon, it explodes...and better this happens IN session than OUT of session. a safe place.it can be VERY VERY difficult to finally find that release, but maybe think of some ways that might make it easier. everyone is different but sometimes i couldn't physically talk so i would draw out something that signified what i needed to talk about...or i would try to write it out and let my T read it.
sometimes i told him "here it is" and handed him the paper, but told him..."here it is, i want you to read it, but i don't want to talk about it". then when he was done reading it, i would change the subject to something light like stress at work or something... that way it was out, but i didn't have to 'deal' with it yet.
its VERY HARD to:
1.have realization that trauma was real
2.deal with memories
3.feel build of bile inside
4.get it out
5.say it outloud (truly make it real)
6.and actually deal with it...talk about it
7.sometimes it helps to tear it apart...piece by piece of memory.i dont know that any of this is helpful.
but i want you to know that you are going through a VERY difficult time. and i am proud of you that you are seeing T, and trying to get through this. it won't be easy and it usually gets harder before it gets better. but i promise you it WILL get better.and you are with friends here.
Keep Posting!
you are doing great Dory!and i say no matter what happens in therapy today, you should be extra nice to yourself tonight...eat some icecream, fix some nice hot tea, watch a funny movie...take a warm bath or something you find soothing.
(((((((((((((dory)))))))))))b2c.
poster:B2chica
thread:784800
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070916/msgs/784815.html