Posted by gazo on May 29, 2007, at 19:58:02
In reply to Re: here you go... the ethics thread, posted by Honore on May 29, 2007, at 17:23:30
Hi Honore :o)
the question of seduction... hmmm....
> that if you are too gratifying-- whatever that means-- that it induces or fosters dependence--*** now, this exact point worked the opposite way with me i think... and i am putting a lot into examining it myself, i am sure my T will want to as well. The reason i feel i became attracted and dependent to my last T was his resistence to me, his with-holding.. the more he pulled away the more i was lured. THAT is one central issue, or portion of a schema for me.. i am most strongly attracted to and dependent on those who do not give gratification, meaning emotional. The new T i have is very giving emotionally, very animated and has a lot of give and take... and although i like him a lot, and i feel i do need him, i don't feel dependent. The more he tries to reach me the less i want him to....
This is why ideas like schema were developed, for people like me who seem to be opposite to the accepted conventions. i showed my T a dismaying article which referred to such patients (me) as "treatment failures."
> I guess As who reject the acceptance of gifts, or cultivate a certain kind of neutrality tend to see things as primarily working through of drives or internal conflict, and believe that a so-called real relationship is not the primary vehicle of any cure. Other Ts, who believe that the relationship is more real, or like that outside of therapy, although it is different in certain respects, tend to be more interested in attachment, or the ability of the T to provide some degree of reparation or better experience, rather than to allow the P to work out purely internal struggles. For those Ts, accepting gifts could easily be seen a providing a new experience of acceptance and valuing what a P can contribute-- whereas in more classical analysis, that would be considered a harmful enactment. (But then the word "enactment" also has taken on positive meanings in more recent analytic writing, whereas in classical American analysis, it had a very negative meaning.)**i wonder why Yalom feels the way he does about the relationship... he doesn't mention gift giving from what i remember, but he does very strongly insist that the *relationship* is the vehicle of cure. He is PA.
poster:gazo
thread:759943
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070525/msgs/760259.html