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Re: felt criticized » sunnydays

Posted by Daisym on December 8, 2006, at 2:28:35

In reply to felt criticized, posted by sunnydays on December 7, 2006, at 20:30:01

Therapy that is working often feels critical, I think. After all, we are criticizing our past behavior or coping skills and trying to change things. Understanding yourself is so very hard.

For me, when I feel nudged along by my therapist, I feel shame of not having pushed myself enough. I'm mortified that he needs to challenge thoughts that I quickly decide I should never have had, let alone shared. (Yes, I know, why am I going to him and paying him if I think I should be curing myself...I know, I know...) And I get terrified that he will get angry if I don't hurry up and fix myself or he will leave or get frustrated with me.

But my therapist, like yours, knows that we are trying hard. Their job isn't to comfort us all the time. It is to keep holding up the mirror so we can see what we are doing and try to understand why we are doing it. Try to separate your thoughts from your behaviors and your behaviors from your self. Your therapist might not like a thought or a behavior, but he cares very much for you.

And when you've had enough, say so. I'm glad he picked up on what you were feeling. I'm sorry it is so hard.

 

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