Posted by SatinDoll on October 29, 2006, at 21:37:27
In reply to Re: It the world ending? My life is goin' to hell » SatinDoll, posted by canadagirl on October 29, 2006, at 9:01:32
I did get my paper written for school. It is n't the best I could have done, maybe a B, but not an A paper.
Then life turns to pure hell. My T says I haven't experienced like one big episode of terror like the Sept 11, but I have had several repeated momement of terror that equally effects me. But they won't stop.
Now my DH had really turned on me. He is so angry I was just stunned today when he blamed me for making his mother move away two years ago. He said if I tried to get along better with her (in other worlds let her run my life) that she would still be in town. Now she might be dying and he is blaming me because he hasn't seen her in two years.
He yelled at me for the state of mess our house is in. That instead of going to a hallween party at the heath club, I should of stayed home and cleaned. All I do anymore, is take care of myself. Well what the hell has he done in the last couple of years to help me? He was with his whore instead, so I had to learn to take care of myself.
Then he said why hasn't that sh*tty T of mine helped me get over what happened to me as a child. Why am I still afraid of my mom he says?
He just shot me down this weekend, I am so numb I don't know what to say or do. I have never seen him be so cruel ever. I know he is stressed, but I have never had that aimed at me. I just feel so awful, I know he is overreacting, but it still hurts. When will the sh*t stop pouring on my head? I am trying so hard to stay afloat for me and the kids, but I feel like everything is trying to weigh me down.
I am so tired of fighting everyone just to be happy. Why is it so damn hard to live?
poster:SatinDoll
thread:698646
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061026/msgs/698901.html