Posted by annierose on October 24, 2006, at 6:52:52
In reply to In Session correction, posted by Daisym on October 23, 2006, at 23:21:57
I don't remember that particular quote but I like it.
On the other hand, therapy can be a wonderous love affair. Finally, there is a person who listens attentively, patiently, empathically --- and no matter the sex, age, physically appearance of the t, feelings of love are often generated. Then we feel left behind. Ultimately they cannot give us what we missed out on as children. But like Dorothy's shoes in the "Wizard of Oz", they can help us discover that we had the power all along.
I do not like living in that space of disconnect with my therapist. I feel anxious, maybe it's fear that I'm losing her, or that I don't matter. Whatever, it's so hard Daisy. And you always remind me that it will come back.
It sounds like he is there for you, waiting, knocking, waiting for you to let him in. He is standing outside and little Daisy is hiding in the best place possible, the closet, whispering, "Go away, I don't want to play today," but he does. He wants to know why you are pushing him away, what are you thinking about, why are you mad? What does his lack of physical touch feel inside for you? For me, (since my t has the same boundaries) it feels rejecting. When I had this go-around a few months ago, one thing she said to me that helped, "I couldn't be your therapist anymore if we became friends. I like being your therapist and the special intimacy we have created right here. Yes, I grant you that it's a very different complicated relationship unlike any other in the real world, but in this room, you get to explore so many different thoughts and feelings and I get to help you with all of it."
So at the end of the day, I wouldn't want it any other way.
I'm around all week if you need me. Sorry that you cannot see your T this week. That makes it so much more difficult. The lingering feelings with no place to process them. Call him if you need to and I am around to listen.
Annie
poster:annierose
thread:697139
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061012/msgs/697244.html